Do you ‘kill’ your chances at a sale? Because a potential client hasn’t responded, YET?

Posted by stevesapato on October 24, 2018

Do you ‘kill’ your chances at a sale? Because a potential client hasn’t responded, YET?

Words words words – sticks and stones will hurt my bones but words will never harm me, was the way I had always heard that expression.

Yet, we all understand that words will harm us indelibly and sometimes forever! And you might be ‘killing’ any chances you had at making a sale or creating a strategic partnership or even just getting a referral if you use the wrong words.

I am a business and speaking coach. I train people on almost everything including how they look which includes body language and facial expression. I recently received an email from someone who was marketing their professional headshots and along with that, facial expression training. I was intrigued! I have met many ‘head shot’ photographers but never one who claimed to be a facial expression coach. How wonderful to connect with and maybe trade secrets, marketing ideas or even referrals?

Then I receive this email –

I was trying to reach you several times, but unfortunately never received a reply from you or anyone from your firm. That’s why it seems to me that you are not interested in facial expression coaching or making a professional headshot photo session that would completely change your appearance on the web and in social networks.

So if you are really not interested in talking to me, it will be my last letter to you. But if somehow happened that you haven’t seen two of my previous letters and you are opened to discuss the details – just let me know. Otherwise, I won’t disturb you anymore.

Thank you!

Wow! Chastising me? Now let’s be honest here. I might have dropped the ball. I might have seen a couple more emails from this person and didn’t reply. Life might have changed dramatically and I picked up and had to travel to Australia to do some corporate training an help other people change their businesses and lives. (Oh wait! That did happen! I am in Australia now and it was a whirlwind event that happened in less than two weeks so I might have gotten a tad busy.)

But this person is writing in a manner that really isn’t conducive to maintaining a long term relationship where I might use their services in the future. Are they?



And, do I really want to change my appearance? Because I am happy with my appearance overall but would like to improve how people perceive me or create different perceptions depending on which audience I am marketing to with my headshot? Stronger for my Leadership and Management clients. Softer for my small business coaching and inviting for my relationship workshops. You see, while I teach others all of these things, few ever reach out to try to teach me? When was the last time someone offered to turn your no responses into YES responses simply by training you on your facial expression, body language, timing of your close offer? Maybe just on the inflection you are using when you start closing? (So many things can go wrong and we have no clue, do we?)

But then this email goes on to chastise me – if you are really not interested in talking to me, it will be my last letter to you.

My gosh! I thought I was reading a note from an old girlfriend when I was a kid! OK! This will be the last time I talk to you, Steve Sapato! (HUMPH! And stomps off)

Am I over reacting here? Because this person does not seem like they want to talk to me again unless I apologize.

Are your words important to future sales? YES! DO you make these types of mistakes in your emails? In your drip campaign? Because this FINAL letter from them is ending all communication –  I won’t disturb you anymore

Should you go back now and evaluate some of your emails that are in your drip campaign? Better yet, should you invite me in to do some training for your sales & marketing team? On Verbal Attitude? Facial Attitude? Physical expressions (body language)? Do you need me to help your team create effective messages that are conducive to turning a no into a NOT YET?

And isn’t a NOT YET response much better than a no? How about if the right questions can turn the NOT YET into a ‘maybe’ and then into an ‘ok, Yes’ scenario?

Words are only 17% of our communication with someone when we are in person but they are 100% when it’s a text or an email. We don’t have the ability to see their eyes change when we hit the sweet spot or see them smile when we get them to agree or frown when we miss that mark.

Words, in the right order, with the right attitude are our facial expressions to others. And I think this Headshot & Expressions Coach missed the mark badly on this email.

I am Steve Sapato and I am the most famous unfamous speaker and coach in America. You can reach me at or (Q = questioning, L = Listening)

Have an amazing day.

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